I know many, many people that love to watch horror. I can’t, I have nightmares if I do. However, I can read a scary book without having nightmares but it sort of hangs with me for a while. Many years before I married I read a book called ‘Harvest Home’ by Thomas Tryon. Talk about scary. I’m posting this first for a reason.
When I got married years later and we were on our honeymoon it was January with over twenty inches of snow on the ground. We stayed in a Pocono, Pa. Resort. When we arrived we were taken to our cabin. It was very romantic with a large heart shaped bed and a huge bath tub for two. A beautiful fireplace, a big comfy sofa, and two overstuffed club chairs. There was only one problem there was no door in the toilet area. It was all part of the same room. Just a half moon shaped wall so it was not visible from the main area. This was not good. I needed total privacy when using the commode. My new husband was so patient with me and for the first few days put on his heavy jacket, boots, gloves and hat if I had to use the toilet he went out on the deck in that freezing weather and waited for me to let him back in the room, because I locked the sliding glass doors so he couldn’t sneak back in while I was busy doing my business.
We were also assigned a table and would be eating all of our meals at along with eight other newly wed couples. Initially, I thought it was great. We met all of them the next morning at breakfast. There was one couple older than the rest of us, I think the maybe early forties. At the time that was old to me, Ha! We all introduced ourselves and several of the couples had been there for a few days before we arrived. They each told us what activities were available and which ones were fun and others that were boring. There was also a heated indoor pool. Everyone was friendly and welcoming. We tried snowmobiling I did well and enjoyed it. My hubby enjoyed it too but he lost control and drove right off the side of the mountain! It was about a twenty-foot drop but by some miracle, he landed right side up and wasn’t hurt. I shot a rifle for the first time in my life and hit the bull’s eye every time. My groom was as shocked as I and the instructor didn’t believe that I had never used a firearm before.
The food was excellent as were the drinks. Both were included in the price. We did have to buy logs for the fireplace (the logs were the ones that were wrapped and easy to start) and snacks which we loaded up on, Mike bought about twenty or so logs, at that time they were only $1.00 each. We had that fireplace going day and night but it was a lovely place for a honeymoon.
We all had stories to tell about our daily adventures. The older couple were very nice but the wife told us the same story every single day at every meal. She had tried snowmobIling and had fallen off and hurt her leg. The motel sent her to the local hospital for X-rays and it turned out to be just sprained muscles but she went on and on how she considered it negligence on their part and should be compensated. This was told to all of us at every single meal. I am not as patient as my husband and was getting ready to tell her to shut the hell up. I am sure the other couples felt the same way I did by the look on their faces when she started her story……again. One evening as we dressed for dinner I told my husband that if she told that story one more time I was going to tell her exactly what I thought. “Please Pat don’t, you will embarrass me, please”?
“No, this is it. I have had enough of her and her story”.
“Please, please do it for me”. He looked at me with those big brown eyes.
“I’ll try but I can’t promise you anything”.
“Maybe she won’t tell it tonight. We can keep asking her different questions and we’ll leave right after we finish dinner, OK”?
“Alright, I’ll try”. Off we went to the main cabin. We found our group and sat down at the table. We started talking about the food and any other subject we could think of to keep the conversation away from the old lady. It didn’t work, right in the middle of a conversation about what a quaint village we had all visited during the day, she started her injury story. I started kicking Mike under the table and pinching his arm. It started with him smiling at me and then it happened, he started laughing just a little laugh at first and of course that set me to laughing and before we knew it we were both hysterical laughing, after a couple of minutes everyone was laughing out loud, asking us between breaths what we were laughing at. My poor husband didn’t know what to say so he looked at me. I was still hysterical so in between breaths he pointed at me and said, “My wife, she’s nuts”.“What”? Everyone asked as they laughed. He hesitated, uh, it’s a personal joke I can’t tell you, it’s too embarrassing and that set me off even more. After about ten minutes or so we all calmed down and finished out the meal with everyone begging us to please tell them what was so funny but we held fast to his original answer. It did stop us from having to listen to the old lady’s story that night. We still laugh about that to this day.
The following night a world premier movie was being televised. Keep in mind this was in the 70’s. My groom and I decided to have dinner in our lovely cabin by the fire that evening and watch the movie. I was a little hesitant but he reassured me that it would be fine and he would hold me throughout the movie. The lights were all out, the fire was blazing, our dinner had arrived. We set it out on the coffee table along with a bottle of wine and some snacks. We were ready to watch the scary movie. When the show started it looked familiar to me, I said; “I saw this already”.
“Pat, you couldn’t have, this is the first time it has ever been on TV and it’s never been in a movie theater”. I started telling him what was going to happen next. How the couple moves to Salem happy to be living in a lovely rural area. They soon discover the stories about witches and human sacrifices that took place in their community. Then I started to tell him about the man in the town that never spoke. His tongue was cut out and a bunch of other gory things that were going to happen. My new husband got this horrified look on his face. He was not holding me any more.
“There’s no way you could have seen this before, it’s a world premier it has never been televised before. How come you know what’s going to happen”?
“I told you I’ve seen this before”.
He started to freak out. “No way, impossible! What the hell is going on here Pat”?
He looked terrified, I was laughing my butt off.
After about the third commercial I finally remembered about the book.
“Oh, I know why I know what’s going to happen next”.
“How? How do you know”.
” I read the book years ago”.
” Oh, thank God, you had me going there. I thought I was a goner. I was almost ready to sneak out while you were sleeping. I thought you were one of them”.
We laughed ourselves silly over that for quite some time. We had a wonderful honeymoon and now we have great memories.